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My finished product reflected my attitude at the time—a combination of "you have to play to win" and "hey, why not?

Here's what I've learned about writing a good ad: 1.

Props that make you feel soulful, frisky, and fascinating help you make those claims for yourself in your ad. It might sound obvious, but be sure to post a terrific photo of yourself. More to the point: I wanted to attract a man who appreciated subtlety.

If you're not comfortable putting your picture up online, avoid overselling your appearance with dubious claims like "Sharon Stone look-alike." I started my magazine personal with: "Curvy, almond-eyed writer, fit (good shoulders)...." My husband says he was attracted to the soft sell of the description and the quirky confidence of the assertion.

More → History has shown us that incompatibility leads to terrible things, like crying and the French revolution and Nick Carroway sucking back martinis like this, an image that will surely haunt your dreams for the rest of your life.

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